Becoming a Mom

I think I still find it surreal that I can call myself a mom. If you are already a mom, then you probably get where I am coming from. If you are about to become a mommy, then get ready to have your mind blown. It’s pretty insane!

The moment that I found out I was pregnant is when it all began. That is the moment, I feel, that I became a mom. Honestly. My hand was shaking as I held my pee stick displaying two lines and I am sure that pee flew everywhere, but I didn’t care. I had a little poppy seed inside of me and I was going to protect it with everything I could. Goodbye alcohol. Goodbye sushi. Goodbye, three or more cups of coffee a day.

Fast forward to today, almost one full year since I peed on that stick. I am more protective than ever. The difference now is that my little poppy seed is 13 pounds, and she is not safely tucked away in her squishy little waterbed that was my uterus. She is now learning about the world, through what I allow her to experience. Right now her world is me, her dad, and the rest of our family. As she grows, her world will grow, and that is terrifying.

I find myself already worrying about “the mean girls” in school. Then I worry that she might be one of them. From there, I remind myself that I can raise her to be kind and good. Then I worry that I might screw up. I worry about her getting her heart broken for the first time. I worry that her innocence will be lost when she figures out how crazy this world can be, much like when I lost my innocence while eating Fruit Loops and listening to the radio at my kitchen table the morning of September 11, 2001. My list of worries extends a few miles. This is called being a mother.

Becoming a mother is by far my greatest accomplishment. When my little one smiles at me I melt into a puddle. When she looks up at me while I’m nursing her, I know I was made to do this. It is also the hardest job in the world, never shutting off, no coffee breaks (unless babe miraculously naps), and no guarantee of what the outcome will be. I get pooped on weekly, spit up on daily, and I haven’t had uninterrupted sleep in over three months. I wouldn’t change a thing.

I would love to hear your stories of mom-hood. Everyone’s is so unique, and all are equally awesome!

#babies #momhood #momlife #birth #encouragement #lifestyle

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